Win Back Your Ex-Wife Enhacing Your Communication Skills
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By admin | September 15, 2008 |
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One of the most destructive elements within any relationship is lack of communication on the part one or both partners. This is true in any relationship whether it is business partners, boss and employees, family members or a married couple. Lack of communication does not mean lack of talking, it means lack of understanding, lack of acceptance, lack of asking for explanations and certainly lack of listening. Hearing what someone says with our ears is not really listening. Often we have to listen with our hearts to understand what someone is saying. A person’s body language often speaks much louder than the words one speaks. The message often lies in the facial expression and other displayed behaviors. Often our words and those of another do not match the behavior we see and in behavior, there is truth.
Men Are Really Different From Women While Communicating
Communication is a tool for resolving conflict however it is often unspoken communication, which creates the conflict. The key to conflict resolution lies in truth, honesty and integrity. Three very important concepts long forgotten in today’s world of mass communication. The sad part is many people choose to believe untruths told by dishonest people who lack integrity. Often greed is the reason behind the choice to believe those who lie.
Often in marriage relationships, the marriage began with a lie, and lack of truth, honesty and integrity remain missing links in the relationship. Lying has become an expected behavior in business, politics, blogging, medical research and just about every other aspect of life. While in most of the areas, where honesty, truth and integrity are missing these destructive behaviors of some, do not destroy other relationships. However, in a marriage these are too often the keys, which open the door to separation and divorce.
Compromise Is The Most Important Part Of The Equation
An essential ingredient in communication is compromise. Compromise means each person clearly stating his and her belief in relation the situation under discussion. Communicating is stating true beliefs not opinions. An opinion is a preference and preferences do not come from sound reasoning, but from feelings and emotions. We must not deny feelings and emotions but rather recognize them as secondary to truth. We may cry real tears but these tears can wash away the debris getting in the way of truth.
Communication requires the ability to negotiate and negotiation infers the ability to evaluate truth and separate truth from fiction. Some people can write out their beliefs clearly and logically but are unable to do this in face- to- face discussions. You may want to consider writing a letter to your ex-wife. In the letter, state the reasons why you believe reconciliation is possible and what you are willing to do to build a solid foundation for a new relationship.
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